SOCKS!

I am DONE!!! I finished my second sock last night! Oh man they are warm and comfy! I'll put a picture of them up soon. I really don't know why I didn't do socks earlier. Hand knit socks are just SO divine!
I am now going to start some socks for Jeremy. Think, Rock Chalk Jayhawk! Yep, they will be crimson and blue! I have lots of projects to do right now. I am making bags for friends for Christmas, socks for various people, and I am in a scarf exchange. So...I have LOTS to knit. Just not a lot of yarn.
Now, an update on the job search. The week of October 9th, I will happily be a single Mom! Jeremy leaves on the 9th for Indiana. He gets back on the night of the 10th, and then leaves again on the morning of the 11th for Michigan. He will be back late Friday night. We are really excited.
If we ended up in Michigan, we'd be by Detroit. That would be a lot of fun. I've read some really great things about that area, so we are stoked! It's a pretty small company. Jeremy hasn't even had a phone interview with them. So, we think they're pretty serious.
Also, a recruiter called Jer yesterday wanting to present him to a couple different companies. One is in Florida. Ooh, I could handle that!

I'm Domestic.

It's true. I've tried to deny it for a long time now. I don't cook, I hate to clean...about all I do is laundry and even that takes me all week to finish.
However, today, I've put all of that to rest. I washed diapers, washed (some) of our mountain of laundry and...ahem...canned 5 bottles of peaches and made 12 jars of jam (or maybe syrup...we'll see). I am pretty dern proud of myself.
I also have finished one sock (YIPEE!!!) and am cruising right along on the second sock. I would be closer to being done, but I had to tear out the heel. It wasn't just perfect, so I need to redo it.
I'll post pictures eventually...but right now I'm too tired!

Indiana

Here we go. Jeremy flies out of here on October 9!!! He has his interview on the 10th and will fly back home that night. I am SO freaking excited! This company is his first choice and he just interviewed with them last Friday. Oh, and there are at least 3 positions open!!!! Please pray for us!!!!

Socks and stuff

Oh boy, socks are fun to knit! I love socks!! I am not done yet with my first one...I want it perfect. So, I have ripped it out several times. Well, not really ripped it out (that would mean I had to start over!), but I tinked (Knit backwards). I had it done the other day, but when I put it on, I didn't like the toe and it was a bit too short. Nothing worse than a short sock...well, maybe a wet sock :)

I went to the yarn store this weekend with 2 of my friends. Lori is making a really cool scarf and needed some yarn. Nicole wants to learn to knit, so we got her yarn and needles. It was so fun! I am not buying any yarn right now (hello restraint!!!), so I had fun living vicariously through my friends! I have decided though on my projects when I have yarn money again. I am going to get some baby alpaca (OH how soft!!) and make myself some socks and maybe a scarf. I am also wanting to make myself a poncho, socks for the kids and some socks for Jeremy. I found some BEAUTIFUL yarn that is crimson and blue (KU colors!!!) that I will make some socks and a scarf for my dear husband. If you didn't know, he has a thing for KU ;)

Now an update on the children. Seth is actually calling me Mama sometimes. Oh wait, he just informed me that "You are not Mom, you are Jack!". This is from one of his favorite books, "I Saw an Ant on the Railroad Track". I am Jack, he is Ant and Jeremy is Train. It really is funny. He's taken to calling Amelia "Little Mommy". It really is hilarious. This morning we got in the car to go to the store and he wanted to sit next to Amelia to "nurse her real quick". He cracks me up!!!

Amelia is doing great. She is just such a happy baby. She reminds me a lot of Emma. Very laid back (which is a HUGE blessing after having Seth!!!) and just so happy. She gets mad if she's hungry or poopy (or if Seth is attacking her)...but really she is easy and fun!!!

Jeremy just got a call from Biomet in Warsaw, IN and they want to bring him in for an interview the week of October 9th!!! He isn't home yet, so he doesn't even know! :D I am just thrilled! Please pray that he gets this job. We would LOVE to live in Indiana. It would be close to both our folks, the cost of living is fantastic and...it's a JOB! :D:D:D

Now, other Moms will understand this. Today, I ventured to the craft store with my children in tow. Why do I do this to myself and them? As I was walking the aisles of Robert's Arts and Crafts, I heard several other Mothers saying things such as; "I'm going to count to 3 and you better be over here! 1...2...3!", and "Put those stickers DOWN!"and "PLEASE Seth, do not touch the candles". Why do we do this to ourselves? Why, why, why do we take our children to the craft/yarn/fabric store? I remember as a child, my little brother begging NOT to go to the fabric store with my Mom. In fact, he despised it SO much that we just had to tell him we were going to the fabric store if we didn't want him to come! ha! I attempt to take Seth to the yarn store and craft stores with me. It never ends pretty. From this time forth, I will either A. leave him home with his Dad or with friends, or B. go when Jeremy is home...or maybe C. leave him in the car! HAHAHA!!!

Fall

I love fall. I love the beautiful change of colors in the trees, the wonderful respite from the scorching summer heat; I love fall. I don't love winter though. I detest winter. I wish that it could be fall and spring year round.
Today it has been cool. I got to break out some of Emma's clothes for Amelia to wear. Today she is wearing a sweatsuit that Emma wore ALL THE TIME. I love to see her in it. It barely fits her though. She is really such a big girl :) All that Mama Milk!
I am ready for cool days where we can go to the park and walk with my babies. I love it!!! Hooray for fall!

Jeremy had an interview with Biomet today. It went really well. He said that they were trying to get through everyone as fast as they could so they could get this hiring done. He should know something by the end of next week. Jeremy really wants this job. I mean really. He has researched the company and feels pretty confident that he is a good fit for this company. We still haven't heard back from Aesculap (sp?) in Pennsylvania and are waiting for another week to hear from Zimmer. They are checking budgets to see who all they can fly out for interviews.

We are continuing to pray that something will come up soon. We are very blessed to have so many family and friends so willing to help us.

All in all, life is good. My kids are healthy, Seth is funny as ever, it's not so hot outside anymore and I have yarn. Life is good.

Some new pictures

Ok, I've had requests to see my knitting. So, here are pictures!!

Amelia's hat











Seth's Hat (it is being blocked right now so he can't wear it yet)














My first sock. I'm getting to the tricky part right now. I need to do the heel. I will be really happy when I figure this out and know how to do it. The method I'm doing is called Magic Loop. Eventually (after I learn how to do one sock) I will be able to do 2 socks at the same time! YIPEE!











And finally, Seth and GEORGE!!! Hooray for George. He is making our lives SO much easier! :D

Ah, sweet success!

Seth's Bye Bye Binkie party was a SUCCESS!!!! Well, at least until bedtime. Then we had weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth. However, in the end (after lots of cuddles, snuggles and reassurances) he went to sleep without the binkie and with George. Yes, he got a Curious George doll to carry around instead of his binkies. Hooray! We had cake and ice cream and two of his little friends come over. We really did have a good time. And, there are NO MORE binkies in my house!!!! :D:D:D

Jeremy has an interview with Biomet on Friday morning at 11:00. This is another company in Warsaw, IN. We haven't heard anything from the other places yet.

Bye-Bye Binkies!!!!

Oh yes, this will occur tonight at 7:30. Seth is saying goodbye to his binkies!!! I am THRILLED beyond description. We'll see how he does with it though. He is getting a small stuffed Curious George and cake and ice cream. Two of his friends will come over for his party. He's pretty excited about it actually. He keeps saying that he wants to throw his binkies in the trash! Hopefully he will do it tonight and not want to get them back out! :D

Pennsylvania

Well, Jeremy got a call from the HR lady at the company in PA today. Apparently she is not sure if Charlie (the guy who initially interviewed Jeremy) wants to do another phone interview or do a face to face. So, she has to get in contact with Charlie (who is out of town) then she will call Jeremy and let him know.
My question is this...why did you call on Friday if you didn't know when or HOW to interview Jeremy?!?!?!?

I Knit...it's a good thing.

I love to knit. Have I mentioned that before? I love that it challenges me. Not that mothering doesn't challenge me, but when I don't like how my knitting is going, I can fix it! I can either rip it out, or tink (knit spelled backwards). I get results pretty quickly - good results. It makes me feel better about myself. And - yarn only loves me. The wool loves me and never talks back, hits, screams, steps on Amelia's head, or cries incessently for me to hold it...wait, yest it does.

I am learning to knit socks. This is more difficult than I thought it would be. Socks are so common. everyone has them. They can't be THAT hard. But, for me, it is. I have already ripped out my socks 6 times in the last 48 hours. I will get it. When I do, I'll show you a picture of it!

Seth told me tonight that he wants to knit. Music to my ears! I can't wait to teach him. I need to learn how to finger knit so I can teach him that first. I think it will be easier for him. I just finished a sun hat for him. The only reason I made one for him is because he really wanted one. I made one for Amelia and it was too big. I gave it to my niece, Tess (she is 11 days older than Amelia, but has a bigger head). So, then I knit another one for Amelia. Seth really needed one, so he got one. I haven't blocked it yet, so it looks like a ruffle on the brim. My brother, Chip, said that he looks like a woman in it. It will be SO much cuter when I get it blocked.

I went on Friday night to see the Yarn Harlot. She was hilarious. It is nice to know I'm not alone in my obsession with knitting and yarn. Well, I knew I wasn't alone. I have my sweet sister Stephanie to thank for my obsession. It was fun. If you check back on her site, you'll see a picture of Amelia. There is an old adage that claims that if an expert knitter places knitting needles in a babys hands, the child will be clever at knitting. So, Stephanie Pearl-McPhee (the Yarn Harlot's real name) placed needles in Amelia's hands. We were laughing that A didn't want to let go of them! She has a great future!

Knitting is taking over my sugar addiction. Ok, kind of. It is filling that void by keeping my hands busy. I can't eat and knit at the same time. I've tried, it doesn't work too well. So, maybe this can be my new diet. The Knitting Diet. I can see it now...it will be the newest fad that sweeps the nation!

Wahoo!

Jeremy has an interview with the company in Pennsylvania!!! We don't know when yet. The lady called to set it up when we were gone this morning. Jer called her back and they are now playing phone tag! As soon as we know more, I'll let you all know!! I am SO excited!!!! (and so is he!)

Ugh.

I have fallen off the no sugar wagon so many times that I don't think it counts that I was even on it (for the 5 minutes that I was!). So, I'm trying a new strategy. Instead of NO SUGAR, I am saying NO SWEETS. I can do that. So, for one month, no candy, cookies, ice cream (ack!), brownies, or anything of the like. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. Jeremy has just propsed that I get a star on the calendar for every day I go without sweets. It's like when we were attempting at potty training Seth! I hope I get as excited about the stars as he did! :D

Jeremy got a rejection letter today from a company here in Salt Lake. He didn't even get an interview. This is so frustrating. We are both so frustrated and just don't know what to do right now. We have money to get us through this month, then nothing. SOmething will come up, that is what we keep saying, but it's getting harder and harder to believe it. He should hear from the 2 companies he interviewed with next week.

I am just so tired of this. Tired of needing to be on WIC, tired of having no extra cash, tired of the stress of no job. I don't know how my folks did it for 13 months...and they had 5 kids! But, they did have savings. It's just so frustrating. I am sick of apartment living. I want a yard for my son to get to run and play in. I want to be able to sit outside with him and not worry about him running into the parking lot or stepping in dog crap that litters the playground.

Like the title says, ugh. That is just how I'm feeling today. Tomorrow is another day. I get to go hear the Yarn Harlot speak. That will get me even more motivated to knit and at the same time make me sad that I can't buy the sock yarn and needles that I want. Someday, someday, someday...

Knitting

Oh I love to knit. I am not at all crafty in any other way at all. And, to be quite honest, I'm not very crafty when it comes to knitting. I wish I were more adventureous, but I'm not. I've only knit hats and diaper covers so far. I've started blankets, scarves and a dress for Amelia, but have never finished any of them. So, I am determined to do something new. This came to me today when I was rolling a beautiful hank of yarn that I was sent at Christmas time. It is wool, hand dyed and just gorgeous! So, as I was contemplating...would it look better on Seth's head or Amelia's bum?, I decided NEITHER! I am not sure what I will do with it yet, but something :) I am also bound and determined to learn to knit socks. Wish me luck there! :)

Jer had an interview with Zimmer in Warsaw, IN this morning. It went well. A couple of the men he spoke with know his grad school advisor. So, knowing that Kent will give a good recommendation helps a lot. We're back to waiting. We should know something within the next week about the 2 interview's he's had recently.

Sugar...the bain of my existence

Ah, vacation. My in-laws vacation that is. We had such a fantastic time with them. We shopped, played, ate (lots of good food), visited with family and just had a great time! Seth misses them terribly now. Today in church he said, "Where's Grandma??". It was pretty sweet. He loved having them here to play with him. When his Aunt Nanny (Stephanie) asked what he did with Grandma and Grandpa he replied, "Played with Legos!" Funny boy. Now I'm tired and have been taking lots of naps to recoup. ;)

So, as you read earlier, we ate lots of good food. Too much good food. I am afraid to even look at the scale for fear of what it will say. So, I am taking on a big challenge. No Sugar. This scares me. You all know me. You all know how much I love sugar. In fact, I think I am addicted. I told Jeremy that he is going to have to help me. I will be going through some major withdrawls for a while, I know it. I'm only doing it for a month. I can do anything for a month. But, I need to do a detox. I have eaten so much ice cream, brownies, candies, cookies and all sorts of good sweet things recently that I know it is making me just exhausted. So, for the health of myself and my nursling, I am going sans sugar for a month. Check in with me. Keep me accountable. If I know that there are people who are watching me, I'll do better :)

Jeremy has an interview on Tuesday morning. Seth, Amelia and I will be kicked out of the house at 8:00. What to do?? Probably go to the park or the library. Back to the job though. I really want Jeremy to get this job. I want him to get any job, but this one in particular. Why? Because it is SO affordable to live there! I have this fear that because I want to live there so badly it isn't going to happen.

We've decided that if the Lord would just tell us where we need to be it would make things SO much easier! We will go anywhere, we just don't know where! We'll even *choke* stay here if we need to. We just want to know where we are going and what is going on with our lives.

So, Tuesday will be Seth's first day of "school". We are going to go to the Library for Toddler Time, then come home and have lunch. After his nap, we'll do a worksheet and start learning about phonics. I think we'll also talk about frogs this week. Or maybe dinosaurs. That is what he is really into right now. We'll have to get some dinosaur books at the library on Tuesday :) It will be fun. I think he will really like it.

Interview Update

So, Jeremy had 2 interviews this week and I thought I'd update you all on how they went. Monday morning, Jer's folks took Seth, Amelia and me out to breakfast and to the park while Jer had his interview. It was supposed to start at 9, so we were gone by 8:30. At a little after 11, Jer called. I thought that this was a great sign, a 2 hour interview!!! So, we went home and found out that it was only a 30 minute interview...he used the rest of the time to do some work that he needed to.
But, the interview went really well. The gentleman he spoke with sounded very encouraging and said that he wanted to meet Jeremy! Now, we wait.

Jer's other interview of the week was scheduled for Wednesday morning at 8:30. So, we were gone by 8 and at 8:45 he called to let us know that it had to be rescheduled to Tuesday. So, we came back home. He's actually ok with it being rescheduled. This gives him some more time to research and get ready.

So, we're still waiting...but at least now he has had some nibbles :)

Big Babies, Breastfeeding and Binkies

How is that for a title?? Amelia is 13 lbs. 3 oz. (as of this last Thursday), she is only one pound smaller at 2 months than Emma was at 4 months!!! She really is a chunk! Such a happy girl though, makes my life much easier.

August is World Breastfeeding Month. What does this mean for me? Well, since I am a breastfeeding Mama, I take pride in knowing that there is an entire month to support, empower and educate women about breastfeeding.
The Utah Breastfeeding Coalition and La Leche League of Salt Lake had a Breastfeeding Cafe' this month at the Downtown Library. This has been such a neat opportunity for so many women to educate and be educated. The library is set up with many shops and one space is called the Share space. It is for non-profit organizations. We set up shop there this month. We have had raffles, massages, comfy chairs (thank you Babies R Us!!) and no shortage of breastfeeding Moms in the cafe'.
I have volunteered as much as my time would allow with 2 small children. I have talked to men, women, children, teenagers, Mothers, Grandmothers, Aunts, Uncles, Fathers, Grandfathers, all walks of life really. I have educated and been educated. I have laughed with Moms and my heart has broken with them. There were women who came from a long legacy of breastfeeding women. Women who were trailblazers in their own right. Women who did what they felt was right, breastfed their babies. Women who, without any help from anyone else, did what came naturally, fed their children.
I also met women who have never known anyone who breastfed. Women who want to breastfeed,. but don't know how. One woman like this came into the cafe one day. She came by and told me she was pregnant and due in January with her first child. She was thinking about breastfeeding, but didn't know anyone who ever had. Her Mother and sisters and friends all formula fed. I gave her some information and she left. She came back about 15 minutes later and sat for an hour. She asked me questions like, "how will I know if I have enough milk?", and "why do breastfed babies nurse so much?". She was also wondering about cosleeping, pacifiers and slings.
It really has been such a neat experience to talk to so many people and be able to share my passion for breastfeeding with lots of Moms! :)

Binkies...ugh, the bain of my existance. Not really, but it is a constant battle in my home. Seth used a binkie until 7 months when he weaned himself of it. Well, in May he found one in his room and started sucking on it. Now he wants it ALL the time!!! It drives me nuts. I've been trying to figure out why it makes me so crazy. Is it because I can't understand him when he talks? Because it gives him red chapped lips? Or, is it because I can't stand the way it looks? Really, all of the above, but I absolutely hate the way it looks. It drives me nuts. But, is it worth the battles? Is this a battle I should fight? Is it really that important overall? Probably not. I'd rather he be honest, respectful, and polite. If I can get those things and he still wants a binkie...well, then I guess I'm doing something right.

It has taken me 4 days to write this! My in-laws are here this week and we are having lots of fun with them; thus me not finishing this!!

3 years...

I can not believe that it has been 3 years since my darling daughter left us. The last 3 years have been very difficult, but also joyous. We've lost our Emma, but gained Seth and Amelia. While Emma will never be replaced, it really is nice to fill our arms and days with the sweet sounds of children.
Today we hung around the house most of the day. I didn't want to talk to anyone, so I didn't. I guess that it is my perogative. Then we went and got our ladybugs, orange and pink roses and some balloons. Jeremy, the kids, Marge and I went to the cemetary and fixed up Emma's spot. The flowers looked perfect and the ladybugs were flying everywhere. We got some great pictures of the ladybugs on all of us (including Amelia's head!). Seth loved the ladybugs. He loves going to visit his sister. He climbs all over her headstone, and I really don't mind.

Anyway, back to Emma. Man sakes I miss that girl. One of Seth's best friends, Aurora, is just weeks older than Emma. I love watching them play together. They laugh and play and fight and make up...they are just like siblings I think. It gives me a good idea of what my life would be like when I am with the two of them. They are true partners in crime. Sometimes I think that God brought this sweet little girl into our lives to help heal my heart.

When I think about what Emma would be like now, well I often romanticize it. I like to think that she would be perfect and that I would never be upset with her, never have to discipline her, never have to tell her to be nice to her brother. I know, all unrealistic. But, I do it.
If I were to be completely honest with myself, I would know that Emma would be in trouble at times...she had a mischevious gleam in her eye...she would bug her brother and tease him. She wouldn't be the most helpful little girl all the time either. I know that in my head (somewhere), but mostly, I think she'd be the perfect angel that she was when I held her in my arms.

I have lots of conflicting emotions too when I think about Emma. I wish that she were here. I wish that she had never died (obviously). But, then I start thinking how my life would be different. Would Seth and Amelia be here? How old would they be? I don't think I would have gotten pregnant with Seth when I did if Emma had lived. And if I didn't get pregnant with Seth when I did, when would I have gotten pregnant with Amelia? I want Emma here, but I also want Seth and Amelia here. I want my cake and to eat it too. I want all 3 of my children here and healthy and happy.

**WARNING**

I will now talk about Emma after she died, if you are at all squeamish or in a fragile emotional state, do not read this. Scroll down to the next set of astriks.

I have also been thinking about the last time I held Emma today. I wish I could have held her longer when she was still warm. When she was in the hospital after she died, I got to hold her. However, they couldn't remove the intubation tube until after the coroner was able to do the autopsy. So, I held her, but I had to hold her with tubes and things in her. I wish I could have held her longer. I wish that when I heard them doing suction on her in the ambulance, and it sounded like she was going to cry, that she really was going to cry. I wish that when I moved her and heard the air come out of her lungs past her vocal chords that it wouldn't have been the last time I heard the sound of her voice. I wish that the last time I wiped off her face, it wouldn't have been the blood on her face. I wish I could have given her a bath on the night of Saturday, August 23 and then clipped her nails and taken her to church the next day with me. I wish her first haircut hadn't happened in the ER room where I held her lifeless body. I wish that the last time I sang to her was tonight when she went to bed, not as I rocked her in the chair in the room where the doctors worked so hard to bring her back to life.
If wishes were pennies...

***Ok, I am done with the more vivid things, but it may still be sad to read**

I often wonder what Emma would look like at 3 years 8 months 8 days. That is how old she would be today. Would her hair have stayed so dark? Would she look more like her Daddy or me now? I want to find some age progression software and see what she'd look like, maybe. I keep praying that God will give me a glimpse of what she'd look like, but it doesn't happen. I guess I'm just not ready.

I am tired. I am really tired of grieving, it is tough work. I am really tired of being so angry. I just want to be able to accept 100% that Emma is gone and that it truly is God's will. I just don't know how to let go of all this anger. I am so angry that Emma doesn't get to grow up with her siblings. That they don't get to make memories together like siblings should. That they don't know her. That when we pass cemetaries, Seth says he wants to go see Emma. That they think she lives there. I hate that there is one person in our family that most everyone will only know through stories, pictures and videos. I hate that Amelia doesn't have an older sister to teach her about makeup and boys. I hate that Seth doesn't have an older sister to teach him how to treat girls, how to dance, and to laugh and play with. I hate it for my children. It makes me so damn mad.
What else am I angry about?? I am so sick of people assuming that I just have 2 children. I have 3 beautiful children. One was just too good for this sick world. Doesn't make it any easier to know that though. I still think of all the days I've missed with her. All the birthdays and Christmases. She never got to have a Halloween, Thanksgiving or Birthday. She missed all of those things. They've all been celebrated with her spirit in Heaven and her sweet body in the cold earth. I am so angry that she was ripped from me. From my breast. From my bed. From my life.
I am also so angry that I know more than any 29 year old should know; and I knew it at 26. I know what to do when a baby dies. I am the person people come to for help when they know someone who has lost a child. I am always glad to help, but I hate that I know how to. I listen to songs about people who have died and I listen to them over and over and over and just cry. I wonder who the people who wrote those songs lost. Who was it that caused them so much pain in missing them? Who was it that gave them the inspiration to write these hauntingly beautiful, and true, songs? I always pray it wasn't their child.
I am so angry that I hurt so bad still. But mostly, I am angry that I am still so MAD. I just want to be ok. I want to let go, but there is so much anger. I didn't even scratch the surface of my anger in this blog tonight. I would get carpal tunnel if I tried.

I miss her. I miss her so much it hurts. I wonder everyday what she'd be like. There is a song by Kenny Chesney, Who You'd Be Today -- it says, "sometimes I wonder who you'd be today". I sing it, "I always wonder who you'd be today". Not a day goes by that I don't think of Emma. Not a day goes by that I don't miss her. I cry inside several times everyday. My heart breaks more everyday. I didn't think it was possible; I thought that my heart had already been broken into a zillion pieces, but there are more pieces to break. I learn that everyday.
I realized today that I have nursed a baby for the last 3 years on this day (and many others), but tomorrow I can't say that. Three years ago tomorrow, I would have given anything to nurse my baby. I prayed that the coroner would call and tell me to come get my baby. That she was alive, that it was all a big mistake. I thought if I had enough faith, that would happen. I know now that faith had nothing to do with it...

You know, as much as I hurt and as angry as I am, I am SO glad that I know I'll see Emma again. I think of people who have no faith in God and how much harder it must be for them. I can't even imagine.
I have a headache, I need to finish up here. Amelia is going to nurse soon and I want to just hold her so tight. She is looking more like Emma everyday. I slip and call her Emma a lot too. I want to change her name so it isn't so close to Emma. Oh well, too late now. I just want to hold my babies and let them know how much I love them. I want them to know how glad I am that they are here. I never want them to think I don't love them or need them or want them. I want them to know that they are EACH my favorites.

Emma ~ Goodnight my Angel, I love you, I miss you more than you know. My heart aches to hold you, my eyes want to see you, my hands want to touch you. Our time was cut too short. There are so many things I wanted to teach you, show you, and do with you. Someday my angel, someday. Until then, I will do all I can to be worthy of being your Mama. I will see you again my darling daughter...

Interviews & Sore Legs

Ok, so we have lots going on right now in our home. First, Jeremy has 2 interviews next week!!! One is on Monday for a job in Pennsylvania (I can't remember where Shannon, but Jer told me it is north of you) and the other is in Warsaw, IN on Wednesday!

Now for the sore legs...Seth has had a very strange week. On Sunday morning he couldn't walk when he woke up. He also had a slight fever, so we took him to the Urgent Care center. They decided it was a virus that was causing joint pain for him. Well, we've had him on motrin since and he's been doing better, but still limping.
Today, he's been complaining of both knees and legs hurting. So, I took him back to the doc. It seems to be worse when he first wakes up or after he's been sitting for a while. They ordered x-rays and a blood draw. Seth was SO brave getting 4 vials of blood drawn! I was so impressed with him. He did cry, but he really did good.

Because of our dumb medicaid insurance, we had to go to one hospital for the blood draw and a different one for the x-rays! Made for a long mornng. The x-rays didn't show any breaks, so we were sent home.

This guessing game is hard. I just want my boy to be healthy and strong again :(

Amelia is crying, so I will update you all later. Pray for good interviews and for answers to Seths legs.

Arthritis in a 2 year old????

Seems unlikely, but apparently that is what is happening here! Seth woke up this morning and can't put any weight on his right leg. His knee is swollen and he has a slight fever. So, we took him to the Urgent Care center. I guess that sometimes viruses can cause swollen joints and arthritis! We've been instructed to give him ibuprofen and lots of fluids and see if it gets any better. If not, we'll take him to the doctor tomorrow. I hate when my baby is in pain. It just breaks my heart.

Jeremy's Mom is here, we are so excited to have her with us. Seth has been so excited to have Grandma here and can't wait for "Greggor Grandpa" to come next week! :) Jer's brother, Brad and wife Karen, have also just moved out here. It will be fun to have more family around.

On the job front...nothing, nada, zip. Something will come up though, we just know it. He has a couple irons in the fire, so we are hoping for something soon.

Amelia will go in for her 2 month check up on Thursday. I am excited to see how much she has gained. She's quite the chunk. She is smiling so much now and really is such a content baby. We have fun with her.

Emma's Angel Day is on Wednesday. Not looking forward to it. I can't believe it's been 3 years. 3 very long years...

How hard can it be??

I have a favorite diaper cover from WeeBees. It is nylon (it dries really fast) and has adjustable snaps (read - fits my babies skinny thighs!). I am in desperate need of some new ones and the website is GONE! I am so sad!!! So, I am now on the search for a new diaper cover. Stephanie and I are talking about making our own...but knowing the two of us like I do, I don't see that happening.

Not much is going on with us right now...same old, same old. Jeremy's Mom, Marge, is flying in on Saturday, we are so excited to see her. She will spend some time with us, then go up to Logan to see her folks. Jer's brother, Brad and his wife Karen, are moving out here on Friday. It will be fun to have them closer.

Let's see...some funny Sethisms...he came up to me the other day and said, "Hey, wake up Funky Mama!". He cracks me up on a daily basis!